Streams of Waiting

This year I’ve been thinking of Advent as a flowing river. We are invited to step into the story, letting the stream of events swirl around us. The prophecies of old and the promises of God course by as we light the candles and sing the carols together each Sunday, yet we still stand in the stream of time, waiting for the arrival of the long anticipated Messiah.

As I reflect on it, there seems to be three different Advents that we are waiting for. The first is the coming of Christmas Day. On this day we celebrate God’s amazing plan for our salvation and redemption with the birth of Jesus, the Christ who was foretold in scripture. We mark the days with Advent calendars and the weeks with the lighting of Advent candles and it all leads up to this annual event by which we remember the gift of love God has given us.

But we also wait for the return Advent of Jesus, when the kingdom of God will be unshakably established for all time and the whole earth will rejoice in the restoration of all creation. When I see the Advent colors, the candles, the Christmas decorations, I’m reminded that another year has rolled around and still we are people who wait for our coming King.

Finally, I wait for the Christ to be fully birthed in my life. As much as I wish that what Paul said was true of me, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me,” (Galatians 2:20) I know that I’m still in process. Sure, I have a few fleeting moments when it is Christ who is in charge and I’m surrendered to his will, but it is far more common for me to be in a struggle for power and control.

And so this Advent I celebrate the wonderful story that has already been given to us, even while I look forward to the future events that remain hidden around the bend. And perhaps most importantly, I remember that in this moment, right now, I can surrender and welcome the Advent of Jesus into myself. Thomas Merton said, “The Advent mystery is the beginning of the end of all in us that is not yet Christ.” I want so much to be flooded with the reality of that, to be “ready for Christmas.” Amen! Come Lord Jesus, Come!

A Litany of Gratitude

As I reflect on this season of Thanksgiving, and all the many blessings I have in my life, I have been thinking of the gifts and graces that I have received from serving as an elder at our church. This isn’t maybe the normal way of thinking about service, and I’ll admit that lots of times I’m more focused on what I’ve given than what I’ve received. Sometimes, I’m more prone to conjure a litany of complaints than otherwise. But as I prepare to leave the Board after a longish stint, I’m in a mood of thankfulness.

I have received the obvious gifts of a place to serve and use my talents, the camaraderie that develops from working on a team, the fun of being in the middle of things. But the real standout moments have happened when I have been invited into other people’s stories and been asked to pray for and with them. These moments of prayer and anointing have been incredibly humbling and sacred times for me. I have been awed, over and over again, at how God meets people at their point of need, and in some mysterious way I also receive a blessing just by being a part of it.

There are certain moments that I treasure and which I will carry with me always. The chance to participate as a celebrant of our communion liturgy was a surprisingly big deal to me, partly because the inclusion of women in the life of our church is always on my heart and partly for the personal expression of trust that I took from the opportunity.

Another moment occurred after an anointing service, when someone I didn’t know well circled back after everyone had left and offered to anoint me, too. It was a profound and unexpected blessing.

And just last week I was invited to come to the final meeting of a James Bible Study. After the group discussed the last verses of James, where he exhorts them to call the elders to pray and anoint them with oil, they had me pray for each person who desired it. Again, I left incredibly blessed and touched by the experience.

There are twelve years of anecdotes and not enough space to recall them all, but, my heart is full of gratitude for each person who has trusted me with their need for healing, guidance, forgiveness or blessing. You have no idea how much it has been a grace in my life to be invited to stand in the gap with you. It’s been an amazing privilege!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Living in Rhythm

As we’ve been reminded in our current series, For All Intents and Purposes, our life with God requires intentionality. We will not be zapped with lightning and changed in an instant, despite our very strong wish that this could be so. Instead, our transformation is more like a long journey, requiring steadiness and purpose to arrive at the destination. We want to be Christlike, but how do we get there?

For years I heard about the practice of developing a Rule of Life, which is a statement of an individual’s (or group’s) specific intentions for daily, weekly, monthly and annual living and cooperation with the grace of God. However, nothing with the word “rule” in it is appealing to me. For one thing, I don’t like being told what to do and immediately want to do the opposite. Clearly, I have some issues. Secondly, even writing my own Rule made me feel like I would be boxed into my relationship with God, and I’ve been on the journey long enough to know that change is good and discomforts me in ways I need to be stretched and challenged.

But then I received a little booklet from Renovare on Rhythms of Life and read that the word “Rule” was more closely related to a ruler – that handy device for making straight lines. To quote from the booklet, “A Rule of Life outlines a pattern of living which is immersed in Christ, and invites us to shape ourselves to it- to become straight and true. Those wooden rules we used in school never commanded us to draw triangles, nor told us where the triangles should be drawn, nor did they make us draw rectangles instead. But, when we wanted to draw a triangle well, they suddenly became invaluable.” With that encouragement, I began to draw up my own Rule of Life. After using my Rule for the past year or so, what I lack is the voice of another asking me “How are you doing? Why is this commitment in your Rule and yet you almost never do it? What are your true intentions?”

A group of people recently went through a Spiritual Formation retreat on how to develop a Rule of Life, and I thought about how useful it would be for me to have others to experiment with in this endeavor. So, I am going to be meeting with anyone who wants to join me over ten Thursday evenings to share our Rules, refine them, and most especially implement them. And ask some nosy questions about where we’re finding it hard to put our “intentions” into actual practice. If you find this appealing and would like to meet with us, send me an email or give me a call. Even if you didn’t attend the retreat, you can get a Rule developed before our first meeting. Start by reading the eleven page Renovare booklet – it’s packed with practical information. We’ll meet from October 21- January 13 (with breaks for Thanksgiving and Christmas) at the church. Hopefully at the end of this time we will have fully engaged ourselves in living with our own rule and rhythm and will have become more “straight and true” in our lives with Jesus.

Celebrating God's Goodness

I’ve been enjoying our current look at the book of Acts. I find the power and activity of the Holy Spirit at work in the early church and in those first leaders to be challenging and thought provoking. Where do we see the Spirit breaking out in our church? How do we experience him as leaders in the 21st century? At our last elder board meeting Shawn Loorz pointed out that it has been a decade since our church began this experiment of focusing our church and its ministries around the reality that the Kingdom of God is at hand and we can experience the fullness and the transformational reality of it as we seek to live as disciples of Jesus Christ. As one of the “eyewitnesses” of that weekend, I’d like to share what seems significant to me ten years later.

That weekend remains the most profound experience of the Holy Spirit moving in a group that I have ever had. While we sense God’s direction and the movement of the Holy Spirit with some regularity on our elder board, it is made manifest in consensus and unity on agenda items, in an encouraging word from someone attending the Elder prayer times, but not in unexpected directions. When we went on this retreat we had our agenda of things to discuss. Radically altering the church was not one of the bullet points. This just arose among us in a surprising way. The more we talked and became excited about what God was doing, the more amazed we were by how a group of people could be together in discerning that God was up to something. At one point, Rick Carr asked, “Is this is a holy moment?” It felt like we should take our shoes off at the potent presence of God. There were no tongues of flame or disturbing noises like the first church experienced, but there was certainly a gentle prompting and call to restructure the church around Jesus’ teaching that the Kingdom of God was available to all who would follow him as disciples. This group awe and solidarity was a really good thing, as it has kept us from ever second guessing our decision to refocus the church. We know God was in it. The verse that we returned to again and again that weekend was Jesus’ words in Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

The importance of this weekend isn’t so much in the story of what happened there, but in how our church has changed and impacted people’s lives and spiritual formation. So, please welcome our guest blogger, Shawn Loorz, for a personal reflection on what the last decade of Oak Hills’ ministry has meant to him:

"I am so enthralled by this Biblical teaching on the Kingdom of God, and I am so filled with hope that this kind of life is actually possible, that I am dedicating the remainder of my life to fully explore just how real it can be.”

- Kent Carlson, February 17, 2002 “What is the Kingdom of God?”

The above quote is from the first sermon I heard at Oak Hills Church almost eight and half years ago. I was 20 years old, engaged to be married, and looking for a church to call home. I had recently gone through a difficult time in my relationship with God, during which I faced my most difficult doubts and questions. Although I had begun to make progress through some of these struggles, I was still looking for direction. I had faced my doubts, and I still believed. What came next?

At this point, Tara and I first came to Oak Hills together and heard the series entitled “Reality Check: Living in the Kingdom of God.” Kent taught that the Gospel, literally “Good News,” taught by Jesus was not only to offer eternal salvation, but also to offer the best life possible here and now. Mike’s teaching helped me see that through our intention and actions, the Holy Spirit will help us become the person we were meant to be. Through Oak Hills, God showed me what came next. Tara and I chose to make Oak Hills our community, to, as Kent said, “dedicat[e] the remainder of [our] life to fully explore just how real [living in the Kingdom of God] can be.”

What I did not know then, but have learned over the years, was that this same journey toward Kingdom Living had largely begun for Oak Hills at the retreat that Valerie writes about above. Not having been there, or even at Oak Hills at that time, I have slowly pieced together an idea of what happened at this retreat. Despite my limited knowledge, one thing has been clear to me: when the leadership of Oak Hills Church gathered in a cabin near Donner Lake ten years ago, God showed up. God showed up in a powerful and unexpected and disruptive and redeeming way. I believe it was clear to those involved, and it is clear now, that God was “up to something.”

Ten years later, God is still “up to something” at Oak Hills. The trajectory of Oak Hills was permanently altered at that retreat. The evidence that God is present and active in our church in the changed lives of the congregation, in the way that people interact and love each other, and in the ongoing leadership toward increased discipleship.

This is not to pretend the last ten years have been easy. There have been many difficulties. There has been some trial and error to figure out what it means to be a church that teaches people how to easily and routinely do the things Jesus taught. Oak Hills is leaner now than it was in 2000. We have experienced many losses that have been felt and grieved by the church as a whole.

I have found there is a temptation to think that if we are truly following God’s direction, that everything should be easy, or at least easier. But this is simply not true. What is true is that we needed God in 2000, and He showed up in an amazing and unexpected and glorious way. It is equally true that we need God and His presence and direction just as much in 2010 as we did in 2000. This is a good thing. We have a God who is faithful, and who has shown that He wants to lead us. Thank God that His presence and direction does not lead us to a place where we are “okay” or “good” without Him.

When I realized it had been 10 years since this journey started, a strong feeling of celebration and appreciation and joy welled up within me. In times where it can be easier to be caught up by scarcity and fear, it is worth celebration that God gave our Elders a “holy moment” ten years ago that changed our church. It is worth celebration that we still rely upon God’s presence and direction ten years later. And I also celebrate that the journey that began at Donner Lake ten years ago that became such an intimate part of my own story.

During a sermon a few weeks back, Mike asked “Is there anything happening at Oak Hills that can only be explained by the action of the Holy Spirit?” Ten years after the Holy Spirit moved in a way that fundamentally altered Oak Hills, let us celebrate the many answers to that question!

Making Room

I’m going to do something that might embarrass a few people and tell a story about them. The last time there was a chance to sign up for Dinner Rounds at church (which is a group of 8-12 people that take turns hosting dinners at each of their homes), Ben and I signed up hoping to meet a few new people. As it turns out, seven of us have stuck together and formed an on-going group that meets about eight times a year. The original intention was to get to know a few people over the course of a year or less, but we’ve been going for about 3 years. We were scheduled to meet again and we had a house guest staying with us, so we asked the group if it would be okay to bring him along. We obviously know this group well enough to know that they would be welcoming and friendly. But I was still struck by the hospitality and goodness of these five other people to make space in a group that now has lots of “inside” jokes and ways of hanging out together. Every person made an effort to get to know our friend. They were, even dining al fresco, the church in the truest and best sense of that word. They cared, they listened, they were curious about someone else. And they were authentically themselves, in a very winsome and welcoming way. I knew they were great people, but as I sat at the table with these friends eating, laughing, and talking about God and life, I was really impressed with them and the way they had of putting a stranger at ease. So Ronna, Dave, Teresa, John and Pat, you have really captured the reality of this quote from Dorothy Day:

“We cannot love God unless we love each other, and to love we must know each other: We know Him in the breaking of bread, and we are not alone any more. Heaven is a banquet and life is a banquet, too, even with a crust, where there is companionship.”

Now that I’ve had my chance to tell a story, what story do you have of the church breaking out in meaningful ways?

Pentecost

I’ve been thinking a lot about the Holy Spirit recently. Several people I know, in addition to the staff, have been reading a book about this aspect of God’s personality, and because of that I’ve found myself in conversations about what it means to be filled with the Holy Spirit. We also have a three week series starting up this Sunday on the subject. And coming up is Pentecost, the day the Spirit came upon the disciples and the church was officially “born.” It’s a nice convergence to have all these different threads coming together.

Some people may think that the Holy Spirit is a New Testament phenomenon, but the Spirit of God permeates scripture, from the very beginning of creation itself in the first chapter of the Bible (Genesis 1:2) to the end times in the very last chapter of the Bible (Revelation 22:17). He is not “new” to the Trinity, but has been a part of the personality of God forever.

The images of the Holy Spirit captivate me. They are boundary-less and uncontainable: water, cloud, fire, wind, noise, dove. When I think of these images, I realize they all have the ability to expand, to move freely, to touch what they will. I find myself desiring to have the Spirit of God, which I know is in me but is not contained (or controlled) by me, expand and have freedom in my life. I wonder what it is he is creating in me at this moment. And I have that same desire for our church. What would it look like to notice the Spirit’s work more? To see where ministries are expanding and infused with a supernatural power? I hope we learn to develop a better language for calling this out in our midst and in each other. It would be a wonderful encouragement to us all.

I am looking forward to this three week focus, to the chance to retell the story of God from the activity of his Spirit in our lives. Let’s keep looking for and discussing the ways the Spirit is moving among us. It will be exciting!

Easter People

I see on my calendar that today, Easter Monday, is a bank holiday in many countries. For a moment I let myself imagine it was because people had celebrated Easter so heartily and whooped it up so mightily that they needed this day off to recover from the emotional and physical toll of celebrating the Resurrection. But really, for most of us, Easter is now over for another year and we are moving on. But I can’t imagine Jesus’ disciples felt that way. After those painful events of Thursday night through Sunday morning, every day that they got to spend with Jesus must have seemed an Easter miracle, over and over again.

According to the church calendar, Eastertide is a fifty day celebration. Every Sunday is an Easter Sunday and on the seventh Sunday, we celebrate the gift of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost. It is a chance for us to exult in the truth of the resurrection, to embrace the peace and joy and renewal that we have because of Easter. To continue the celebration of light over darkness and the defeat of death. I’ve stumbled across several quotes by St. Augustine lately that I love:

“We are Easter people and alleluia is our song.”
“A Christian should be an Alleluia from head to toe.”

Aren’t those great and motivating sentiments? To show up at work, at school, at home as an Alleluia would be an awesome thing! To gather together on each of the next Sundays of Eastertide proclaiming, singing, reading scripture, with enthusiasm, just dripping with Alleluias because we embrace the resurrection so fully it comes out of our pores. I think it’s a good challenge to us. As we walk through the next 48 days, let’s let our lives shout out the truth that we are Easter people, that what we say we believe has really taken root in us as individuals and as a gathered community of believers. Here is one last quote from Augustine (who lived from 354-430):

“In the psalms it says, ‘Sing to the Lord a new song; sing his praise in the assembly.’ We are urged to sing to the Lord a new song. It is a new person who knows a new song. But make sure that your life is singing the same tune as your tongue. Sing with your voices, sing with your hearts, sing with your lips, sing with your lives…Do you want to speak the praise of God? Then be yourselves what you speak. If you lead good lives you are God’s praises.”

Let’s proclaim it with our lives: He is risen indeed!

Lent: Saying "yes" to God

Once again we are in the season of Lent. This is an annual observance which helps to prepare us for Holy Week and Easter. The forty days are symbolic of many things: the 40 days of the flood (Gen. 6-8), the 40 days Moses spent on Mt. Sinai receiving the Ten Commandments (Ex. 24:12-18), the 40 years the Israelites spent wandering in the desert (Num. 13-33), the 40 days of Elijah’s flight to Mt. Horeb (1 Kings 19:1-12), and most significantly, Jesus’ 40 days fasting in the wilderness (Matt 4:1-11; Mark 1:9-12; Luke 4:1-13). I think it’s not coincidental that all of these are journeys that various people took with God, encountering him on his own terms and in the process growing stronger in their knowledge and faith. And this is exactly what we are invited to do. We don’t have to go up a mountain or wander into a desert or seal ourselves in an ark, but we can use the next 40 days to journey with God right where we are. It’s easy to see why fasting is such an integral part of this experience. The more we can strip down our lives of what is excess and diversionary, the more space we make to encounter God and find out what he wants to prepare in our hearts. Whatever we choose to give up, whether it is chocolate or facebook, meat or video games, shopping or TV, our fast goes beyond just saying “no” to ourselves (although that is good and useful) but opens us up to the hunger and thirst that ultimately only God can fill. I think we often focus too much on the “no” of Lent, feeling self-satisfied with our denial and sacrifice, but I like to think instead that Lent is the opportunity to say “yes” to God. To strip away the things that keep God’s movement in our lives at arms length and to invite him to come journey with us and show us what it is he is calling us to as we walk with him from Ash Wednesday to Easter Sunday. How much more joyful is the redemption and life that he offers us when we have looked squarely at our need and been humbled by the very real presence that is with us always? I hope that you will accept the gift that Lent offers and think about saying “yes” to God.