As many of you are aware, Oak Hills has lost two members tragically in the span of a couple of weeks. Hugh Reed was a leader within the Oak Hills community for many, many years. He was unexpectedly diagnosed with extensive cancer on June 22. He passed away on August 8 from complications before he had the chance to thoroughly battle his cancer. Tarrah Mead was actively involved in the Youth Ministry at Oak Hills both as a student and a leader for several years. She was involved in a catastrophic car accident on August 12 that left her body alive but broken, and her brain irreparably damaged. She passed away on Sunday. She was 21. It was obvious from the first time you met or even observed Hugh or Tarrah that they were the type of persons that made this broken world a brighter place. Since they have been gone, the world has seemed dimmer and colder.
Oak Hills has lost wonderful people in the past and will unfortunately lose wonderful people in the future. But the tragic, sudden and unexpected deaths of Hugh and Tarrah have sent a shockwave of grief through the church. Our community is reeling.
As I attempt to process my grief, I cannot escape the pain. I don’t think we are supposed to. Death is the inevitable and gut-wrenching result of a fallen world where disease and violence reach everyone. It hurts. Our Leader, Jesus Christ, knew and felt the pain of death and loss. When Lazarus died, he wept. (John 11:33-36.) When Jesus overlooked the city of Jerusalem, he lamented its destruction and loss. (Luke 19:41-44.) When faced with his own impending death, Jesus pleaded for an alternative. Even God incarnate felt the sting and ache of loss and death. Jesus’ mourning shows us that our mourning is alright, because all things have not yet been set right.
I have realized that this grief is a temporal matter. That is, in the Kingdom of God, our loss is not permanent. We will be with our brothers and sisters again in the Kingdom of God. In my experience, this truth does not do much (if anything) to lessen the pain of loss, but it does underscore that pain with hope. All is not lost to the very real pain of grief. Our hope in God can carry us forward to the day when we will be with all of our loved ones and the grief and pain will finally be fully healed. Our hope in God helps us live our lives out of our love for God and those we miss rather than being controlled by our pain and grief.
When I was a child, the idea of eternity frightened me. Eternity (I thought) was an endless stretch of time that could never be understood. The older I get, and the more loss I face, the more I realize that eternity is a place without the constrictions and boundaries of time where we will enjoy the sweet fellowship of those we love.
Lord, we miss Tarrah and Hugh and our other lost loved ones. It hurts. It breaks our hearts to be without them. But we place our hope in You, knowing we have an eternity without bounds to be in Your presence with them.
